excuses.

1. i was out of town from the 14th to the 27th.

2. i don't have my SD card with me.

3. you already knew i sucked at keeping up with a blog.

but i'm back from texas and Christmas was wonderful. aside from the HORRID food poisoning (DO NOT eat at a little restaurant in keller, tx called tuscany. ever. i've warned you.) DD was an angel while we were there, her sleep habits stayed the same (thank you sweet baby Jesus in Heaven), and she got spoiled rotten by the family.

i did not take her to the cemetery when i went to see my parents- it was really cold and she was napping (see? told you i was full of excuses), but that didn't make that trip really any easier.

and it's new year's eve. a friend is taking sienna for the night (well, until the hubz and i go pick her up) and i plan on drinking my weight in sangria. i was pregnant last new year's and fell asleep before the ball dropped, i want to make up for a little bit of what i missed last year. :) so..... HAPPY NEW YEAR'S Y'ALL!

make. these. cookies.

like, yesterday.

my secret santa gave me the pioneer woman cookbook (thanks mayo! ::wave::) and ZOMG. i think i have a new favorite cookie. and i am a hopeless devotee to my chocolate chip cookies, so you KNOW these are good.

go here. now. http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2007/09/marlboro_mans_favorite_cookies_oatmeal_crispies/

i will post pictures of cookies and me being a nerd and eating cookies when my interwebz isn't sucking at life.

po' baby.

shots. suck.


but all mom's know that.


yesterday she only had to have two, but she acted like she was dying this time. last time it was just a few tears, a boob in her mouth, and the world was right again. this time she cried, then escalated it to a scream, and shot me the most horrible, accusing look a baby could possibly give you. it was like she was thinking "WHY the fark did you let them do this to me mom?!?!" i felt so bad. and it took much much longer to calm her down this time. boob magic didn't even solve the problem right away. you know what did solve the problem?


dad.


crap. she's developing DGS (Daddy's Girl Syndrome) already. i need a mama's boy. because here pretty quick, i'm going to be "just mommy".

i'm etsy famous y'all.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35822962

we were just too beautiful to NOT to put on the interwebz.

::dies laughing::

23 years ago...

i was born!

a friend of mine, the glorious Shan from http://the818.com, gave me this. i'm only slightly disappointed she's not trying to have sekz with me. le sigh.

oh, and i had to remind dh to tell me happy birthday before i left for work this morning. ha.

the christmas blanket that dh said she didn't need.

but it's just so damn cute, i couldn't help myself. and it didn't take me but a little over an hour of straight work... which means two days when you have a baby, lol. and the minky is SO soft. but for some reason i expected it to be thicker than it is. ::shrugs:: oh well.

me = rookie

so.. this photoshop crap... yeah, i dunno what i'm doing. i'll learn though. i just need to read, which i don't have time for right now. but here's an example of what i CAN do. which isn't much.

here's the image SOOC-

and here's the image after i played with the RGB curves. i don't even know if you are supposed to do that, but i did-

so there.

today is dragging ass like none other.

i just looked at the clock. it's only noon. someone. help me. i might go insane.

::headdesk x a fafillion::

on another note, i think i finished shopping for the wedding/rehearsal dinner next month.

p.s.
22 days.

i think we're pretty cute.

we had family pictures done this weekend and i think they turned out pretty good for as inexpensive as they were! we have never had pictures done before, and i am happy that we did, i don't want to be that mom that has no good family pictures for her kids to look at when they get older. there are a couple i think that are over exposed, but whatevs. and thanks to the guy running around with the neon green shirt, you made it impossible for the photographer to get DD's attention. jerk.
http://amyhummel.zenfolio.com/shoars

hokay. so now you all know that i suck at keeping up with a blog.

but you'll forgive me, right? how about if i include a craptastic, cell phone quality, but oh so cute pic of DD?

ok, so now that you've forgiven me, we can move on. we made an offer on a house, and it was accepted, so we are halfway there. well, sometimes i am pessimistic, and we haven't sold our house yet, so i feel that we are 1/3 of the way there. but whatever. someone, buy my house?

anywho- WE ARE GOING TO TEXAS FOR CHRISTMAS!!! i booked the hotel today, and i am so excited, i could just pee. but i won't. because that's just not sanitary. the hubs is in a wedding in dallas on the 19th, and after that's all said and done, i am going for drinks with my bestie from college (hi katie!) and then we are going to abilene for the holidays with the fam. i am so excited to show my kid to everyone. and maybe my family will give dh shit about having another baby... somewhere down the line. because come on, she's way too cute for us to stop now, right?

we have family pictures tomorrow, so you can bet your sweet little tush i will AW'ing the hell out of them once i get them back. and i have been slacking on using the camera, but i have a feeling there will be picture overload in a few days, what with chopping down our Christmas tree, dh going duck hunting, blahblahblah.

my new house.

::snicker::

yeah, i wish. this weekend we went to the "christening" of A Cowboy's Dream ( http:://cowboysdream.com )... and i fell in love. i want to live there SO badly. if i had 12 million (yes, 12 million) to drop on a house, i would copy this to the t. the food was amazing, there was proscuitto wrapped aspargus, prime rib, ranch beans, crab stuffed mushrooms, sweet potatoes and marshmallows, cornbread... oh i could go on and on. it was DELICIOUS. i think i ate my weight in rare cow. the very best part?

there was an OPEN BAR.

you know i took advantage of that shit. and i got intoxicated enough to leave containers of pumped milk on the counter labeled "DO NOT USE", enough to post on a message board and not reeaaallllly remember doing it, enough to pass out in my contacts. i had a damn good time. and there were pretty cowboys in chaps running around, i thought i was a pool shark, and i hugged the old man bartender. he made a damn good bloody mary, and it deserved a hug by God.

this is the only decent picture i managed before someone saw my "professional looking" camera and said no mas.

size 4's.

i never ever thought i would wear size 4's again in my LIFE.

i bought two pairs of 4's at express yesterday.

::commence dancing::

so. i nearly died yesterday.

yesterday we drove the piece of shit truck to vegas, hoping to trade it in for a car, but we didn't find anything we liked, so we had to drive the damn thing home again. we seriously were about THISCLOSE to getting in a head on collision on the highway. dh went to pass, and when he got over, someone without their lights on flipped them on, and they were close, so dh went to get back behind the guy we were trying to pass, and the dumbass slams on HIS brakes. so we were skidding on our tires, trying to stop, the guy next to us wouldn't get the hell out of our way, so it was either hit him, drive off the rode, or smash the guy coming straight for us. finally dh gunned it (thank you beater pos for not quitting on us right then!) and got in front of the dumbass. and it messed some shit up on the truck. but we made it home. i have never been so scared in my life. we were going 70, me in no seat belt (because it is broken, not because i'm an idiot who doesn't wear her seat belt), DD in the carseat on the benchseat (no backseat.) i cried afterwards. ugh.

oh, i forgot to tell you.

i talked my uncle out of buying the tacky crushed velvet and leopard print dress.

::does touchdown dance::

p.s.
he was going to spend $70 on it. seriously.

i have an addiction.

and it's looking at fabrics and yarn on etsy. at least i'm not addicted to crack or something. i'm not going to end up in rehab, but there is going to be threads and scraps and little pins all over my house before this is all said and done. i was just browsing along, and i have decided DD needs a Christmas quilt. made out of this.

i am certain my husband is going to kill me. i haven't ordered it yet, i am going to finish the first one i started, because then i doubt he will grouch as much. but she needs a warm Christmas-y blankey, with minky on the back, don't you agree??? well, i don't care if you agree or not, she NEEDS it. yes she does.

home sweet home?

i think we found our lot this weekend... it's a little over an acre, right underneath the beautimous Ruby Mountains, right where i will freeze my ass off in the cold cold winters. as long as the contractor doesn't come back with an estimate that is 10k over the original estimate, we will be putting an offer in on it this week! now if we could only sell our house here, life would be perfectly spectacular. anyone want a little old house in BFE, NV?

the lot, the road, and THE VIEW.

my first attempt at quilting...

so, the red is far too saturated a color, but whatever, i am going to make it work. the colors are halfway between the flash and no flash pic... it's so irritating to not be able to get the colors to come out right on "film", but this kind of gives you the idea. i can't wait to finish the damn thing, so i can see if it looks decent enough to use or not, hahaha.

DD's first trip into the mountains.

it was such a pretty day saturday, we decided to go use the 4 wheel drive on my pickup, and headed up into the mountains. and it was the perfect opprotunity for DD to wear her camoflage outfit, don't you know. and yes, that's a mossy oak hairbow. sorry if i scare you with my no-makeup-face. and if i scared you with my no-makeup-face, here's my husband. he's hot enough to make it up to you.
we saw some mountain bluebirds, the state bird...

some gambel's quail...

about 500 of these...

and a really pretty sunset.

it was a pretty good day.

it's a wonder stinky doesn't try to kill me in my sleep.

i made a legwarmer for sienna... that would fit her when she is 15. the pattern was WAY too big, and i slipped a stitch on accident, so it ended up in the trash, but not before we made a cat stocking out of it though. stinky is such a good boy. i love that cat.

pollo

these are the new pullets, hatched august 11. i think there are are 15 of these crazy idiots... they move so fast, we either count 14 or 15. they think you are out to get them, you are the big bad chicken eater, but when you have treats for them... they love you. until the treats run out, that is.

the hubz finally got peed on.

this morning he was leaving before me and taking my truck, and since we didn't want to mess with the car seat base, he took DD to the sitter... i had just fed her, and i was still laying in bed, so i handed her to him and he was in the middle of changing her, when i hear "ew ew ew ew ew EWWW! she PEED!!!"

y'all, i don't think i have laughed that hard in a long time. my huz, the man who performs necropsies on old dead animals as part of his job description, can't handle a little baby pee. he was standing there, a diaper in one hand, a wipe in the other, just staring at her in her wet jammies. he was holding his pinkie finger out all prissy like too, because "there's PEE on it!" lmfao.

so i saved the day, mopped up the pee and changed her clothes, so he could go disinfect his poor peed on finger. gawd.

let's just make it tacky shit day then.

i had this picture on my phone. a cousin of mine sent me this. it has a rhinestone the size of the farking Hope diamond in the middle of it. and it's bigger than her whole head.

the best part? it has matching shoes.

and then this... my uncle works in a cosignment shop a few days a week... he about shit his pants because "OMFGTHISISFROMNEIMANMARCUSSOITMUSTBEAWESOME!". in all truth though... it's fugly as well. not to mention the fact that the new nursery will be aqua and red. i have three options here. 1- it can get snowed on in the back of the truck on the drive back from texas, and thereby ruined, 2- it can hide in DD's closet for the rest of her life, or 3- i can use it for firewood at my next bonfire, and i will dance around the fire and sing praises about it's destruction. it's going to give me nightmares about carnies living in my house, okay?



and yes, i am aware i come off as an ungrateful snob, but this shit is fugly y'all.

kill me now.

my uncle wants to buy this for my daughter...

IT IS CRUSHED VELVET AND LEOPARD PRINT PEOPLE! I CANNOT HAVE MY DAUGHTER WEARING THIS TACKY SHIT!

he has sent the picture to me three times, trying to show me how "pretty" it is. if by pretty you mean it looks like a hooker threw up a baby dress, then yes. i think he's already bought it... how in the hell do i tell him this is not. cute. without hurting his feelings? i can't just take it and grin, because it will only encourage future tacky purchases! this shit is bad. it reeks of toddlers and tiaras. damnit.

the search for the great pumpkin

was a futile one. it was 95 frickin' degrees, which is way too damn hot to be frolicking around looking for pumpkins. the pumpkin patch was definitely picked over too. most of the pumpkins left looked like this sad little guy...

but we got lots of good pictures while we were there. and i SWEAR, when you watch you hubz with your child... your heart will melt into the biggest puddle of lovey goop.

do you feel the goopiness? i'm starting to feel it...


yep. excuse me while i collect my heart goop... one second. ok. thank you.

anywho- we got some good pictures of my daughter, aka dirty booty, and one good one of the three of us together.



and we ended up having to buy pumpkins from walmart. good old walmart. they weren't the ginormous, perfectly round pumpkins of our dreams, but they served the purpose. and for the record, this is the first year my pumpkin turned out better than B's. so we're at 3-1. but as i was driving out of the driveway this morning, i glanced at jack, and i am pretty sure he's already started to shrivel. damn this desert and it's pumpkin ruining abilities. i forgot to vaseline him. ugh. oh well, at least i snapped a pic last night to prove my victory to the world.

yarn. i haz some.

something must be wrong with my husband. because not only did he let me buy a bunch of yarn when we went to town this weekend, but he didn't whine when i ordered more from WEBS. and *gasp* he even helped pick some out. crazy, i know. i didn't hear one word out of his mouth about how i have too many things going at once, and that i didn't NEED any more yarn. i think he wants something... actually, i know he wants something. and i know what it is too, but we won't go into that on the interwebz. :)

a friend of ours has a three week old son, and i decided he needed a hat like sienna's, so i knitted this up for him this weekend. he's so tiny compared to my gigantic daughter, so i am hoping that this fits him.

if you want the pattern for it, you can find it here-
http://heyjulie.wordpress.com/2007/03/20/babykids-earflap-hat/

fabric collection- too many dots.

i want to do sienna's new nursery in aqua and red, with some pink and green thrown in, and i totally fell in lurve with this stripe- which a famous decorator friend of mine veto'd... i don't listen very well it seems. so off i went with my stripe to joann's... and i came home with too many dots. even the green is a version of dots. crap. and i still need lots more blue. so... today i shall scour etsy for fabrics that DO NOT CONTAIN DOTS. but i want to start on this quilt NOW. not that i don't have enough projects going on right now...

i really want this.

now, i know the little one won't fit into it for a few years, but still... the work that was put into this, the skill... it's amazing. and i need it. she's doing a giveaway, so you know i'm crossing all appendages, hoping that by some alignment of the stars, that it ends up on my doorstep.
http://grosgrainfabulous.blogspot.com/2009/10/queen-of-hearts-and-alice-in-wonderland.html

blog attempt #4523428978

hopefully this time is doesn't end with me forgetting, and apologizing, and then forgetting some more. i got the really easy halloween header do-hickey, a bunch of crap i want to talk about, and some pictures i can show you. as the title suggests, i have a finger in every pie. now, while you sit there are picture me with my finger in apples, cherries, blueberries, and crust everywhere, let me tell you what i really meant. i have some hardcore ADD when it comes to keeping myself entertained. i am in the process of learning photography, how to knit, quilt... i need to reteach myself to crochet, because the huz has to have a CERTAIN hat... and i like to cook, so i am constantling tinkering (read:blowing shit up) in the kitchen. sometimes, i have success... other times i end up ripping up/ screaming at/ throwing away whatever i was doing. it's expensive, this inability to do just one thing. i'm a new mommy, so that adds to the chaos. we are in the midst of trying to sell our house... don't even get me started there. :)